Fast Food

I guess we get to start this off earlier than I expected…oh well.

I was sitting in line at Taco Hell a while ago and got behind this person placing several orders.  I could hear everything that was being said and, let me tell you, this is the kind of customer that gets flies in the burger and piss in the lemonade (insert Clerks 2 references here).

Three of the four orders had “extras” on them, they wanted the second and third order together, but in different bags..I’m guessing that they were dropping someone off and didn’t want to have to sort it, and the first and fourth order payed for separately.

All in all, the order went something like this:

“Let me have a #2….no, change that to a #3.  I don’t want any vegetable on that. Uh….and I need that separate.  OK….uhhhh..and I need a #6..make that 2 #6….cheese only.  I need that together with the next, but could you make sure those are bagged separately?  OK…and I need a box meal..” wah wa wa wah wah waaah?  “Uhh…could you repeat that?” Wah wa wa wah wah waaah?  “Uhhh..coke. And can I get three chalupas with no meat and just onions?  And a pickle?…”

Ok…so I made the pickle thing up, but you get the point.  Generally, I have to assume that people go to the drive through because they’re in a hurry.  It’s faster to drive up, order, and drive off than it is to find a parking space, go in, order, go back to the car, and try to get out of the parking lot.  At least, that’s why I do it.  And, I generally have a very good idea of what it is I want to order ahead of time.  I may be a jerk, but I like to consider myself a fairly considerate jerk.  I don’t like to tie up a drive through ordering for an army when there are people behind me that just want to get in and get out.

Maybe there should be a list of drive through guidelines.  I would propose something like this:

  1. Know what you want before you drive up.  If you’ve never been to a place..GO INSIDE.
  2. Sure…Booger King says you can have it your way, but if you want to make more than a SIMPLE change or two…GO INSIDE.
  3. If there are more than two orders you want to make…GO INSIDE.
  4. Keep it simple…they WILL screw up your order then, you guessed it…you’ll have to GO INSIDE to fix it.
  5. You know they screwed your order up because you ignored rule #4 so, instead of checking it right there, you pull up about a car length to check it.  Now I can’t get to the window…it’s too late, you’re not going to back up to the window…if you’re that worried about it you should have…GONE INSIDE.  Move along, nothing to see here.
  6. Don’t sit at the CrackDonalds window and distribute all the food to your Jerry Springer sized brood before driving away.  If you want a dine-in experience you should GO INSIDE.  Or, at least find a parking spot or something first.

Ok, I think I’m done for now…..


2 responses to “Fast Food

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